The toto of a woman who uses danfo bus to come see you and that of another woman who uses an Uber, are never the same thing.

As an experienced lady, I can tell you that when a woman uses an Uber, her toto is already marinating in the car in anticipation of you. Like, the ikpu is already steaming and half done. By the time she arrives at your place, you just need to apply a little fire to finish off the job.

But you see this yellow Danfo? Instead of the toto to marinate, it is drying up like azu a mili ami. By the time breeze blows the odour from the conductor’s armpit to her nostrils, as well as the mouth odour from the passenger who won’t keep their mouth shut, every anticipation that was building up for nragbu will die instantly. Not to talk of the hard passenger seats that will make her nyansh strong for 600 years.

By the time she gets to your place, what you’ll be hearing is “I’m not in the mood”.

You’re not the cause, nna. Next time ask her to use Uber.
Nti adikwa umunwoke?